JUST CODE.
Turns out:
Humans are basically just biological spaghetti code.
This hoodie comes with:
– metallic blue DNA strand
– an ATCG sequence that probably no one checks
– Coordinates that definitely look important
– and STATUS: ONLINE
Because evolution probably looked at proteins, anxiety disorders, and electricity and said:
“Yes. Fits like this. Ship it.”
Minimal on the front.
The real error message is on the back.
✨ Why this hoodie is your new home
- Metallic blue DNA print on the back
- ATCG sequence for maximum “trust me bro, it’s science” energy
- STATUS: ONLINE, because your brain never really shuts down anyway
- Clean front, slight system error on the back
- Feels like a sturdy hug from a very overworked operating system
📋 Tech Specs
- Heavy Blend fabric (271.25 g/m²)
- 50% pre-shrunk cotton / 50% polyester
- Double-lined hood with drawstring
- Large front pocket for hands, snacks, or existential problems
- Classic unisex fit
- Quarter turned to avoid center creases
- WRAP-certified
Size chart (in cm):
S: 68.6 x 50.8 | M: 71.1 x 55.9 | L: 73.7 x 61 | XL: 76.2 x 66 | 2XL: 78.7 x 71.1 | 3XL: 81.3 x 76.2 | 4XL: 83.8 x 81.3 | 5XL: 86.4 x 86.4
Note: Deviations up to 5 cm possible.
🧵 Care & Shipping
Care instructions:
Wash inside out at 30°C. No fabric softener — it kills the air-jet yarn. Do not tumble dry. Iron only inside out, never over the DNA print.
Shipping & Returns:
We deliver worldwide for free. 30-day return policy — because we know you don’t compromise.
Rebelaicious: JUST CODE. STATUS: ONLINE.